Holy Crap

So it's been almost 6 months since I last blogged. I can't believe it. I have no idea where to start, as there are too many memories and not enough words to explain everything.

In the past months, I have grown up so much.

I have finally learned how to be ok by myself. And not in a depressing way. I've finally learned how to be ok with spending a Friday or Saturday night by myself, doing something for me.

I've learned I really enjoy to bake or cook random things- even if they aren't always the best. Cupcakes are my stress reliever, and I am finally a true Hoosier as I have made no bake cookies and buffalo chicken dip. Win.

The past six months I have certainly learned who my true friends are, and who I can always count on.

One thing I've learned- no matter how far I am, my family are the closest and most reliable people I can have here for me. My parents and sister are so incredibly supportive, and even so far away I feel like I can lean on them no matter what is going on here.

It is a weird thing to be across the country in a one year program. I've noticed that everyone changes, whether you are in the situation or not. That may not make sense, but when I moved here I got down that everyone at home seemed to change, and I was staying the same. I in fact was the one who had changed the most. I had moved away, and I was completely alone. I was learning the ways of a new town, a new school, and not living in the residence halls. It was all so wonderful.

The past six months I've lost a friend to a tragic war, let go of an old love, lost contact with someone I thought I would have in my life forever, checked out a book from the school library, went to the James Dean festival, fell in love with the Windy City, fell in love with a boy from Iowa, got a tattoo with my sister, got a cat, spent New Years Eve in Times Square, baked over six dozen cupcakes in one night, did a happy dance in my apartment tipsy to Rihanna, slept in way later than I ever had, experienced my first drag show (that was kick ass!), met David Letterman, survived Snow/Icepocalypse 2011, wrote a 25 page paper with over 20 references, and made some lifelong friends, among many, many other things.

I've learned that I only have me. And in the end, we are all alone, but at least we are all together in that. Thank God for P.S. I Love You. I am so thankful for everything and everyone that has come in and out of my life.

Life is an amazing thing. I'm so lucky to have everything I have. I have experienced love and loss. I have experienced tears and smiles. And I have experienced the smallest thank yous and the biggest hugs.